drumroll, please ..

it's official.

after VERY much thought and deliberation

i've decided to quit my job.

this is something i've dreamt about for a LONG time

and even though i'm scared to death

i am hoping/praying/wishing that this is going to be the best decision i've ever made.

it's going to be hard, really hard

especially at first

but i think as long as adam and i keep it together for those first couple months

we can make it.

this was a mutual decision 

and although adam is going to take the brunt of the fiscal strain

i know things will improve in time

and we will both be super happy that we decided to put our boys first. 

that is what it ultimately comes down too

our boys.

they deserve the best 

not the best that money can buy

but the BEST.

wish us luck

;)

[and send donations! hehe]

hmph!

[kullen's 'sad' face]

this is totally how i am feeling today.
as many of you know, i am a government employee. with the high likelihood of a shutdown - everyone around these parts are in panic mode. there for a while, i couldn't have cared less and was ready to embrace some time off at home with my lil dude. until yesterday, that is. our boss called a meeting to discuss the 'potential shutdown' and there i was told that i would be considered essential and therefore have to report to work. no, i don't mean my entire department - i mean ME.
while many of you would cuss me up and down for complaining that i will still be working while others will be worried about how their mortgage is getting paid - rest assured that regardless of my working status - i am in the same boat. you see, IF (yes, IF) i even get paid, it will be retroactive. meaning i won't see a dime until the government resumes for normal business. nice, huh.
another depressing issue - after it's all said and done, EVERYONE could be paid retroactively. meaning all my coworkers - who had days/weeks off to spend with their family and clean house and do fun things - will get paid. so, while i was reporting to work and they weren't - we're all getting paid? how FAIR is that? 
maybe i'm just a negative nancy or complaining carol - but how would YOU feel. all your coworkers were off enjoying the nice weather and you're dragging your butt into work and at the end of the day [or shutdown] we're all getting a paycheck. just goes to show how UNFAIR this government REALLY is.
and you want to talk about budget cuts? how about these Cong. cut out the THOUSANDS of dollars they are paying for magazine subscriptions or food vendors (i.e. - chickfila). i mean with a nation in fiscal crisis - do you REALLY need the government (i.e. taxpayers) to foot your Washington Post bill? or your Chickfila catering?  i guess i'll stop before i lose my job ... you know the one where i'm underpaid and overworked? 
blah. i'll be over here, at my desk, sulking if you need me.