i realize it's been a while since i've written about my big boy! [gasp!]
since he has turned two - i quit doing the monthly updates. i'm not sure why really but i'll blame being pregnant and now having a newborn! ;) hopefully i can start them back up - it makes tracking milestones a lot easier PLUS i know you all love to read about my children as much as i like to write/talk about them! ;)
so much has changed with him that i don't even know where to begin! he is turning into such a big boy and knows/understands so much more each and every day.
NINNY:
gone! i think i mentioned in a previous post that we had taken it one day and he had done fine - well, he's done fine ever since! we took that thang and never looked back! since rhys has been around and has a ninny - kullen has put it in his mouth a few times but always has a huge grin behind it like he knows what he's doing. i always just laugh and tell him ninny's are for babies! the thing he most likes to do it snatch it from rhys [or his rocker] and throw it across the room or hide it. it's almost as if he's saying 'well if i can't have one, rhys can't either'! little devil ;)
BED:
not in it. errr, not in it regularly. we put him in there from time to time but he hasn't actually been PUT to bed in his room for a while. [i will elaborated more later as to why] anytime he does get moved into his bed, he wakes up multiple times and i have to either a) go lay with him until he's back asleep and quietly sneak out and back to my bed, b) lay with him and accidentally fall asleep in there until morning or rhys wakes up or c) finally give up and take him back to my bed where he sleeps without waking.
POTTY:
i wish i could type 'the kid is potty trained' but reality is that he's not 100% just yet. we've yet to take him out without a diaper/pull up on. i did buy some plastic underwear type thing that i will start using here shortly - or, at a time where i have adam with me just in case of an accident - and hope those will help wean into nothin but undies! but, at home and even at steph's - he IS using nothing but the potty! for the last 2-3 weeks that i was home with him, he would not wear pants/diaper/undies and would go strictly on his potty anytime he had to go. [pee and poop] i was nervous about him going to steph's and how he would react to the change but he has done GREAT. i am so proud of him. it was almost as if we woke up one day and things clicked for him regarding the potty and ever since that day - he's gone [almost] every time on his potty. we've had a few minor accidents but nothing purposefully. he will sometimes go sit on his potty by himself but usually wants me [or someone] to sit with him. 'pee pee potty maaaaa' as he grabs my hand and says 'it' [sit] and points right in front of his potty! :)
BIG BROTHER:
he's really a good brother. for the most part, he is gentle with rhys. when giving him a kiss, he definitely is. but there are sometimes he just wants to touch him and doesn't realize that he can't touch his eyeball or head, so when we tell him to stop he doesn't really understand why. a lot of the time, he simply goes about his business as if rhys isn't even there. but then sometimes he wants to 'hold' him or help me change a diaper. there hasn't been any jealousy issues now that rhys is around and i'm so thankful for that. i think kullen knows he still has mommy's heart <3
TALKING:
this kid will say anything! every now and then he will just start randomly pointing things out. i was watching him eat his lunch the other day and he stopped eating and named everything on his tray and around him. it went something like this 'juice, fork, plate, cheese, truck, rhys, mama ...' once he pointed me out and saw i was watching him, he giggled and stopped! his speech definitely isn't perfect and a lot of times nobody can even understand him [even me] but it's still super cute. he has a tiny little lisp and still rarely pronounces the first letter of any word! he also knows his name - but can't pronounce that right either! he refers to himself as 'NUNNY'! so, me and adam often find ourselves calling him that! =X
SINGING:
he LOVES LOVES LOVES to sing. his favorite is 'wheels on the bus'. i even had to buy a stupid 99cent app for my phone that sang wheels on the bus! ugh! we recently started playing kids song CDs in my car and he LOVES it! he always asks for 'head shoulders knees and toes' which coming from him sounds like 'ed, oulders, oes'! he also likes 'no more monkeys', 'ABC song', and 'she'll be coming 'round the mountain'.
he recently starting putting his hand up to his ear and going 'psh pshh pshhh' - like a DJ! he saw that in an ABC music book where the tiger was playing the turn tables! ;)
HEALTH:
i'll start with seizures. i wrote about his first one here. after that, he had two more that i briefly discussed here. i didn't go into detail of the second seizures because they weren't as major as the others. he had been sick all week - i'm talking laying in bed, sleeping all day sick. i had a doctor's appointment [pregnancy] and adam had to work. i asked steph if i could drop him off for an hour or so adam and i could go to my appointment - pretty sure it was a sono appt! adam picked him up after the appointment and my phone rang a little bit after. the first thing adam said to me was 'please don't panic but ... ' and i already knew. not even off of stephanie's road, adam looked back and saw he was seizing. adam pulled over and got him out of the car seat but by the time he did that, the seizure was over. i told adam to just bring him home. he was pretty much fine that evening, still lethargic but talking/playing like normal. that night, i woke up to him seizing next to me. since that made #2 in a 24hr period - we took him to the ER. they again told us there was basically nothing they could do except give him motrin/tylenol until his fever broke.
we had our neurology appointment in june and it went just as i expected. left there feeling no better than before. the neurologist said that since he has only seized with a fever, there is no concern of epilepsy and that anytime he begins to spike a fever, dose him with the highest dose of fever reducer.
fast forward to sept 25th - i had just had rhys and we decided to make a trip to babies r us for some baby items. we had rhys in his carrier in the front of the cart and kullen was sitting/standing in the back part. adam decided to take them over to the toys while i browsed around the clothing section. while i was looking at stuff, i heard a cry but didn't think much of it because it didn't sound like my kid. well as i was walking, i saw adam coming around the corner of an isle - holding kullen. so i walked over [didn't hear kullen crying or anything] and asked what happened. adam told me that he went to climb out of the cart and before adam could catch him, he fell. as he's telling me this, he is handing kullen off to me so that i can hold him - well, i immediately see that he is seizing. i drop to the floor and hold him on his side and told adam to call 911. the seizure lasted about as long as the first one did ... i'd say 90 seconds maybe. but this one was different. i can't really explain in words but it was different than the febrile ones. after he stopped, his eyes kept rolling and he wasn't taking breaths of air regularly. there was a long pause in between breaths and i kept calling his name or moving him to 'bring him back' if you will. i talked to him the entire time and was saying things like 'woody/buzz' or 'candy' to make him aware. finally the ambulance got there and i carried him out. he was pretty alright by this point, i got him to tell me what an ambulance says 'woo hoo wooooo' but they took him anyway. they had to put a neck brace on him and strap him down to the back board. he was tired and wanted to sleep so the ER techs said he could. once we got to the hospital, they were so concerned that he was sleeping - even though i assured them it was nap time and he was usually hard to wake up WITHOUT having a seizure. they recommended a cat scan to make sure there was no brain swelling or damage and of course we complied. he, of course, woke up before the cat scan. that was hard for both of us. i was able to stay with him and hold his hand but he didn't like it. he kept saying 'all done mama, all doneeee'. finally, we were finished but they kept us at the hospital for a few hours just to make sure he was okay. the cat scan came back perfectly fine and by the time we were ready to go - kullen was too.
[leaving the hospital]
we went back to childrens a few weeks after and although he had another seizure without a fever present, it wasn't a 'out of nowhere' seizure so they still aren't worried about epilepsy. in fact, she said that the seizure was probably not even from the 'blow to the back of his head' but that he held his breath and that caused lack of oxygen to his brain. his brain reacts to trauma by seizing. some kids black/pass out and some kids seize. unfortunately, kullen is one of those kids.
the neurologist said that we SHOULDN'T have to worry about him in the future, not being able to play sports or anything like that. she said by the time that he's 3, his brain should have matured enough to the point where he shouldn't have seizures from either trauma or fever.
fingers crossed, right?
PLAY:
trucks/cars are still his all time favorite things to play with. he loves to line them up and make a train out of them. in fact, the kid will make a train out of ANYTHING!!
another favorite is his trash truck! he's become obsessed with trash trucks since watching toy story 3. he's also obsessed with that movie. i mean, we watch it like every day and he can even quote lines from the movie! we bought him the trash truck for going pee/poop on his potty! he was SO happy. i told him we were going to get him a prize for being a big boy and he immediately said 'aaaash truck?' so that is what he got!
he is definitely more into TV these days so i make sure we watch things that are at least a LITTLE educational. some of his favorites are umizoomi, little einsteins, dora, bubble guppies and of course yo gabba gabba! i love when he watches dora and gets really into it and talks along/back to the TV. there are a lot of times where he even says the right things!!
he is growing up so quickly!!! sometimes i just want to stop life from moving but then again, i love watching him grow and learn. his personality is definitely one of a kind. he is my world and although he's stubborn and defiant more often than not, i wouldn't change a thing about him [well, except maybe the seizure crap!]
LOVE YOU NUNNY! ;)
life around the poag house has been somewhat boring lately. that is, until sunday night. i don't exactly know how to lead into this so i'm just going to start with how it went. yesterday afternoon, kullen and i went to my friends tastefully simple party. that morning, he felt warm so we gave him some tylenol and didn't really think much more of it. well at the party, i noticed he felt a little warm and was just wanting me to hold him versus playing like his normal self. so after i placed my order, i decided to head home. on the way home, kullen had fallen asleep - not something i was surprised by. when we got home, he woke up a little bit - enough for me to give him a dose of tylenol since he had felt warm. after that, i gave him to adam. adam was holding him and kullen was cuddled into his chest. i ran upstairs to change and when i came back down, i sat on the couch. it wasn't but 2 minutes or so had passed and i glanced at kullen, in my husbands arms, and noticed something wasn't right. i asked adam if he was okay and as adam pulled him, i knew something was wrong. my son was having a seizure. i'm not exactly sure how to describe the next 5 minutes other than extreme panic. although it's mostly a blur, these images burn in my head. adam was on his feet, repeating 'are you okay, KULLEN, are you okay??' i was frantic looking for the phone to call 911. finally i found it and dialed. two rings and the lady answered and i managed to choke out 'i need an ambulance!' i'm not exactly sure how our conversation went aside from me in complete panic and her repeating 'ma'am, i need you to calm down' [yeah, SO easy for you to say] the entire time i was on the phone with her - maybe 2-3 minutes, kullen was seizing. adam had him on the floor and was giving him chest compressions. [yes, i know ... not what he needed but we didn't know that at the time] finally, i pushed adam's hands away and managed to tell the woman on the phone that he was exhaling but not inhaling and that i was fairly confident he was seizing. she told us to lay him on his side and support his head. i remember at one point, we had him on his back and his eyes were opening but rolling back in his head. his face was purple and the whites of his eyes were as well. i remember screaming 'he is purple, he's not breathing' to the woman. finally, i heard sirens. i ran outside twice but they weren't there yet - the third time, i saw the firetruck. i screamed 'they're here' on the phone and the woman told me to talk to them and everything was okay and hung up. i KNOW she was happy to get me off the phone. by the time the paramedics got there, he was finished seizing but was still laying on his side, gasping for air and foaming/drooling.
it's so hard to explain this in words. i thought my son was dying and can't describe the things that were going through my head. although my husband was trying to be calm, he was just as frantic as i was. the panic in his voice is something i will never forget. even though we both knew it was a seizure, we didn't know if he would come out of it or what. we new he wasn't getting air and i know we both thought for a second that we were losing our baby. i can't describe that feeling but i hope none of you EVER have to go through that feeling. i also know that some of you HAVE and you know what i mean and i'm sorry. i'm sorry that you had to go through it and watch your son/daughter and know there is nothing you can do. know that you are completely powerless.
the paramedics were in the house for about a minute before caring my limp child out. every single one of my neighbors were outside at this point [firetruck, ambulance and four police cars - i would have been outside too] i felt all their sympathetic eyes on me and i hurried behind the man carrying my boy. adam was running behind me and asked where they were taking him, i told him i didn't know and just to get in the car and follow and i jumped in the ambulance. they let me sit beside him and hold his hand while they stuck those round thingys [lack of better word, sorry] on his legs and chest and monitored him. by now, he was awake but not aware of what was happening. he was twitching and drooling still but looking around. he wasn't crying but more of a moaning sound. they pricked his foot to check his blood sugar and he didn't cry at all. i was asking the paramedic about brain damage and he reassured me that kullen would be just fine. by the time we got to the hospital, he was responding to my voice. the amazing paramedic carried him into the hospital and once we were in a room, placed him in my arms. as i adjusted him, he said 'mommy' and then barked. those of you who know kullen, know this is a GOOD sign. he barks at EVERYTHING! i was relieved that my baby was okay. as we waited for adam, i sat there, holding him and sobbed my eyes out. the nurses came in and checked him temp and gave him another dose of fever reducer. finally, adam got back to our room. kullen was almost asleep but woke up to give his daddy a kiss. neither of us could fight our tears any longer and kullen couldn't fight the sleep. i held him in my arms as he slept the entire time we waited. after the doctor came in and talked with us about febrile seizures she informed us they were going to have to take blood. not long after, the nurse came in and got a huge vile of blood. that woke him up but shortly after, he was back asleep. the doctor came in and said his blood work came back good except his monocytes were a little high so he was definitely fighting an infection. because it came on so suddenly, as did the fever, that is what caused him to seize. we left the ER thinking our son had mono, although i wasn't totally convinced since he didn't show many signs. in the car, he was smiling and giving his signature 'stink' face and adam and i were both relieved.
once we were home, we got him to eat some mac and cheese and chicken and he was playing a little bit on the floor with his trucks. we went upstairs to change and lay down and within 10 minutes he was fast asleep. i was able to sleep as well but definitely not soundly. around 1am, i noticed he was very warm again so we woke him up for a dose of motrin. i spent the next hour just watching him, making sure he was sleeping/breathing.
monday morning, he was practically back to normal. he was a little lethargic and wanting to lay with me but he was at least eating/drinking/playing/talking.
we got him to his pediatrician at 1:30 and after peeking in his ears, which he did AMAZING for [very unlike him] she discovered that he had an ear infection. she said the fever was most likely from the ear infection and prescribed him some antibiotics and gave him a lollipop for being such an amazing boy!
once home, a few of our neighbors were outside and asking us how he was. i always knew we had nice neighbors, but this incident really showed how much people can care without hardly knowing you. the night it happened, we had a note from one of them saying they weren't sure what happened but we were in their thoughts and if we needed anything to give them a call. we got a call from another neighbor later that night saying the same thing. it's amazing how a few words from practically strangers can touch so much.
i can't describe the relief i feel knowing there is nothing seriously wrong with him. i am still totally on edge and can't let him out of my sight nor can i get those images of him seizing out of my brain but seeing him smile and hearing him call 'mommy' almost makes me forget about it all.
it's now tuesday and the kid is totally back to himself. mama, however, is not. both the ER doc and his pediatrician told us that the likelihood of him having another seizure is slim to none but it's still something i fear. every shake/jerk, i'm sent into panic mode thinking it's happening again. unfortunately, i can't get those images out of my head. as if i wasn't already paranoid about leaving him, it's gotten 100 times worse. he hasn't been out of my sight at all since it happened and i know having to leave him tomorrow for work is going to be hard. actually, hard isn't even the word.
but, bottom line is that my baby is alright. we went through something traumatic here in the poag house but we overcame it and have grown stronger. we may have turned into softies, saying yes to everything and spoiling him even more than before but it's alright, we're his parents and we're allowed. he is our son and he is the most precious thing in this world to us and just in case we needed a reminder of that, we got one. never take a single moment for granted, spoil your babies, love hard and forgive quick - and all that other cliche stuff! ;]
i'll leave you with a picture of my little valentine, sleeping. which he has done LOTS of since.
