May 15, 2013

[don't] complicate me

why is it that people tend to over complicate things these days?

what happened to the days of simple. just letting things be what they are instead of trying to search for some over-complicated, analytical reasoning behind them. i mean maybe i'm just lazy and would rather just accept things for the way they are versus trying to find something more behind them.  

like, when did friendship become so complicated? 
i haven't always had the best record with friendships in my past ... i tended to let other people control my way of thinking about people and it never ended well for me. but these last few years, i have definitely evolved.
why do people spend so much time and effort in trying to figure out if something is wrong in a friendship instead of just asking that person who is supposed to be a friend. 
i have, on multiple occasions, witnessed first hand friendships dissolve over nothing at all. one side thinks the other is mad at them, the other doesn't know what to think and when it's all said and done ... the friendship is over. why can't people just talk to each other? i don't know about y'all but i talk to my friends. 
i mean, sometimes talking to your friends about an issue/problem doesn't always end well [i know first hand about this one]... but you know, at least you said what you wanted and you either move on or walk away from the friendship KNOWING you TRIED versus not.
we were born with voices - we should use them.


also, when did parenting become so complicated? [yes, i know - this is a touchy subject]
a thousand and one books to read before the baby is born and another two thousand to read during the first year of his life? what is the point? 
i mean - i read one book while i was pregnant. 'what to expect when you're expecting'. [a second after boys were born - 'what to expect the first year] and even then, i didn't read from cover to cover. i basically skimmed over each chapter for interesting points. 
i always figured - even before i had kids - that most things would just come natural to me and for the most part, it did.
don't get me wrong - there were times that i had to consult the interwebs or my 'what to expect the first year' book but for the most part ... parenting isn't all that hard. 
kids crying? only a few things could be wrong - hungry, diaper, tired or just wants some holding/comfort. none of that soothes him, well then he's just a fuss bucket and you should trade him in [i kid .. i kid ..] but for real, i don't need a book to tell me any of that. 
as parents - we know our kid better than anyone else. ESPECIALLY better than some loony bin 'doctor' who has never met your kid. what works for one kid, definitely won't always work for the other. 
so your kid is fussy? or maybe exceptionally happy? or maybe they're just a kid ... and they're new to this world and dealing with an overwhelming new sense of life ... why does it need a fancy shmancy name? a 'wonder week', a 'leap', a 'sunny week'.  why do we as parents feel we have to make excuses for our kids? [again, something that i am guilty of .. but this blog is just as much directed towards me as anyone else] they're just kids ... and if they're being a little fussy, SO WHAT? they're kids. matter of fact, they're BABIES. i don't feel like i should have to justify to anyone why they're having a bad day. don't we, as adults, just have bad days?!
it's almost like someone decided they were tired of explaining constantly that their kid is just a kid or just feels like being a brat at the moment and decided to come up with some new term, ... "my kid is still perfect, just going through a wonder week." 
maybe i'll start saying that ... whenever i'm in a bad mood i'll just tell people look .. i'm going through a wonder week ;)


i hate when people act like they have perfect kids [& lives!]. come on, NO ONE is perfect. you may have a better behaved kid than mine - but keep in mind that no two kids are alike. my kids are definitely spirited and can be difficult sometimes - but you know what, they're mine and because of that it's no wonder they are that way. they may grow up to be a doctor [to your childs kid - food for thought] or even the president. i don't know why so many people waste time and energy on other peoples kids behavior. what does it concern or affect them? when i see a kid behaving well, it makes me happy. when i see one behaving badly, it also makes me happy. because i've been there. BOTH places. my kids can be great one day but hellions the next. they're still kids at the end of the day and wear their hearts on their sleeves and love with everything they have. i admire my kids - and all kids for that matter - for that trait.  maybe i'm over complicating by even writing about this, but it's just something i've been thinking about. i don't like complicated. i like easy. i like go-with-the-flow. i like freedom. 
when my kid throws himself on the floor because i took something away that he wasn't supposed to have [like a knife! [[again, kidding ..]] haha!] i'm just going to laugh [or maybe sigh] and say .. 'what a brat' ... because that's what he's being. and i'm okay with that. i was a brat and i'm sure you were too. 
if i think a friend is upset with me ... i'm going to ask her about it. not just going to sit there and wonder if i did something wrong! 

i've never been one to think too deeply into something. i take most things for face value. if i'm being nasty, tell me i'm being nasty ... i would probably tell you. if my kids being bratty ... so what. you gonna lose sleep at night over it? i'm not. you gonna tell me that you're kid is NEVER bad. i will laugh in your face ;)




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